A member of the cornhole boot camp asked about how to play better against players he feels are better than he is. I mentioned that this is just a confidence issue. But not necessarily just a cornhole confidence issue, a problem with a foundation of confidence in everyday life. 

The thing about confidence is we can't just create it for the one sport, game, or skill we have, we have to have a foundation of confidence going into it. The growth mindset tells us that we can become proficient at anything if we put time and energy into it. The fixed mindset says that we are all born with certain skills and you either have it or you don't. In my life, I have noticed that the growth mindset is the true one.

This means we can build confidence in anything if we believe in ourselves. Our confidence comes from the inner dialogue we have especially in new or challenging situations. 

A confident person will think thoughts like, I can do this, I got this, I might suck but that's okay I can get better.

Someone that struggles with confidence will think things like I don't know if I can do this, I have to win to show people who I am and what I can do, and I will probably suck.

So to become a more confident person you need to pay attention to the inner dialogue and start challenging those thoughts. Most likely, they aren't even your thoughts to begin with. They are patterned or programmed from the ages of 0-7 when we are considered to be a walking unconscious mind. We don't have the ability to discern whether we want the information or not. It just comes in, like it or not.

So often, our thoughts are shaped from a young age and we've never challenged them. So start questioning those beliefs. Is it true? Why would it be true? Is that voice even yours? Where do these thoughts come from?

You'll start eliminating those thoughts and making room for helpful dialogues. And this will build your relationship with yourself and your confidence.